Single Lady- Surprisingly Unjaded

When I’m single, there’s nothing I enjoy more than being completely preoccupied with the thrill of the chase. Let me explain.

When you’re single, and you venture out of your home  - the air is always thick with possibility. (Especially when you haven’t had time to do your hair or makeup.) Even when you’re not thinking about it, it’s there in your subconscious. There’s a chance you might bump into a nice stranger on the street, be stalked by gorgeous customer in the supermarket, or drop a weight on a cute trainer at the gym.  And who doesn’t just love when you’re single, and boarding a plane - hoping (praying) you are seated next to a hot billionaire who accidentally sat in economy. It makes going out at night about ten times more exciting. You should try it!

The feeling is addictive. How ironic then is it that we single people are hunting the very thing that will inevitably end this thrill. Mmmm… perhaps that why I’m still single?

Or perhaps it’s because I don’t like the idea of having to close myself off from other ‘possibilities,’ or answer to someone, or compromise and worry about someone in my spare time. I love my selfish single life.

Or perhaps, and I highly suspect it is, I’m single because I just haven’t met the right person.

The one. Someone whom is even better than my selfish ways. (Not possible!) But I do want someone I can fall deeply and utterly in love with. Where the look of them, their smell or the sound of their voice all point to a button that tells me they are for me. Full Stop. Which means being wildly attracted to them. And I will want nothing more than to be in their presence; to bask in their ‘ness.’

Is it unrealistic to want a partner that is so right that I know I will NEVER look at a single lady and feel jealous? Nor will I EVER conceive or consider being with someone else, so long as I should live? (Is this even possible?)

Most importantly, I do want to see them fully - for who they truly are – warts and all, and I want them to see me – honestly, warts and all, and still be in love… perhaps even more so.

I’m worried I’ve watched one too many Nicolous Spark movie here. It’s hard to imagine this kind of love without loosing yourself completely – especially when you’re as fiercely independent as I am. And yet I don’t want to settle for anything less. I’d much rather be single. Am I setting myself up for failure? I don’t need Mr Perfect, just someone who is perfect for me. There’s a huge difference. And it doesn’t need to be now… just one day, preferably before…35? (Can I put a number on it?)

Somebody wise once told me “You don’t get to choose who you fall in love with.” (And it is possible to fall in love with the wrong person. Dangerous I’ve done it before!)

All I know is that I want my heart to flutter when I glimpse ‘the one.’ 

How do I know this kind of love exists? I don’t. But I do know something.  When I look at pictures of a certain beloved family members, they make my flutter. Not in a romantic way - obviously, but in a deep profound loving way, that means that I love them so much... it actually hurts, and the thought of losing them sends pin-pricking tears to my eyes in an instant. So I know that exists.

Plus scientists have proven that true romantic love exist… and lasts forever. They measured peoples physical reactions to looking at their spouse even after 50 years of marriage. Those in ‘true love’ still got flutters. Amazing, though surely very rare.